Storm

There’s a winter storm hitting the northeastern United States. It’s trying to get in the way of my 2014 momentum. Fortunately, the library and gym are open so I made it to both today. Here are a few thoughts I had today:

Every Day Counts. In order for me to progress at a rate I desire, I must make every day count. I have a bad habit of calling it a night at 8pm and fucking around until I go to bed. I usually go to bed extremely late, although I have been making it to sleep at midnight-2am recently, and quite frankly I don’t even have interest in wasting time anymore. Every day counts, and this means it is okay for me to load up on stimulants like caffeine if I am hitting a lot of resistance. Getting the work done by any means necessary is more important than whatever perceived moral purity I retain by doing it “natty”. A wasted day is simply unacceptable.

Schedule Breaks. Breaks are absolutely necessary, yes. However, I have the tendency to extend moments of laziness into periods of lethargy whilst rationalizing it to myself by calling them “breaks.” Breaks are only breaks when I schedule and control them. I’ll have a better idea of how long and how frequent my breaks will be as time progresses. For now, I will push through during study/work time and allow myself to decompress when it is time to decompress. Ultimately, focus is just a muscle and one that I intend to strengthen.

Complete Errands ASAP. These include emails, correspondence, returning phone calls, listening to voicemail, checking tracking numbers, mailing things, etc. These require absolutely no effort so just do them fast and get them over with. Don’t substantiate them by adding them to to-do lists. Take care of them as they come up and don’t look back.

Internalize Daily Activities. No need to plan out each day. All of my days are already planned in my head. They each follow a very basic script. I wake up and simply read the script. No room for indecision or improvisation. Wake. HIIT. Study MCAT. DNB. MM. NY’er. Fiction. Non-Fiction. Audio Lecture. Meditation (guided and non-guided). Date/socializing/sarging. I’ve determined years ago that these are my priorities, and nothing else matters.

Go to Bed Consistently and Get Enough Sleep. This past month I’ve finally been going to bed consistently. Not sure how it happened, but it just did. I’m very used to functioning while deprived of sleep, but I want to be functioning at a higher level and getting enough sleep allows me to do that for an extended period of time. I can function well for a day or two without sleep, but as I mentioned before, every day counts and I don’t have room for any slip ups. I am playing life on full tilt.

Executive Decisions at Night. From the moment I wake to the moment I finish my daily activities, I will be operating in a form of autopilot. This is sort of like intoxication, except it’s one where the senses are acutely aware and I am present to the moment. The idea is focus. I will not be making executive decisions like questioning the value of a certain task or overhauling my life plan. I am a pensive man by nature, and quite frankly I am sick of introspection. I live outside of my head now, and will only allow myself to ponder the finer parts of life when I am decompressing before bed. This is also when I do my writing.

Aim for Supersanity. I’m sick of drugs that blur the senses. I never liked alcohol. I never liked cigarettes. I like marijuana but can reserve it for decompression. Most of the other drugs I take are drugs of a different class. Facebook. Instagram. OkCupid. 4chan. Reddit. Texting. Bullshit. Bullshit. Bullshit. These are just ways to pass the time. But I don’t want to pass the time. My time is invaluable. I have too much to accomplish. Drugs are not helping me reach that goal. They are only distracting me. Fuck the blue pill. I am only focused on things that improve my focus and redouble my nascent efforts to improve myself.

“When you’re scrubbing up before a difficult operation, it’s true: a chill does go through the veins. The only way I can describe it is to compare it to intoxication. Only it’s an intoxication that sharpens, rather than dulls, the senses; an altered state of consciousness that feeds on precision and clarity, rather than fuzziness and incoherence… Perhaps, ‘supersane’ would be a better way of describing it.” – Anonymous Neurosurgeon